Mike Meynstream’s “Interview” with Bill Clinton

(Inspired by this article)

MM: Mr. President, it’s an honor to have you as a guest on our little blog.

CLINTON: I know! What’s a blog?

MM: It’s a kind of website.

CLINTON: Oh, like the ones with all the naked ladies? I love those! Actually I’m a member of quite a few.

MM: I don’t doubt that for a second. Mr. President-

CLINTON: Call me Bill, Mike.

MM: President Bill, how do you feel about the upcoming elections in November?

CLINTON: I feel great! Historically, we should win. We might well win one or more houses. Maybe even the White House!

MM: In 2008?

CLINTON: Why wait that long? We’re on a roll!

MM: What makes you so confident?

CLINTON: The Republican strategy is weak. Look at them: “Let’s forget about global warming and talk about flag burning and gay marriage.” I don’t know how long you can milk that cow.

MM: Have you ever milked a cow?

CLINTON: My sex life is none of your business. But I will tell you this: Democrats need to focus on their differences with the GOP and on promoting what they stand for. One of those things should be fighting climate change.

MM: So you are sharing that position with Al Gore?

CLINTON: I never had sex with that man … Mr. Gore!

MM: I wasn’t trying to imply you did.

CLINTON: Oh good. You scared me for a moment, Mike.

MM: Al Gore believes we only have ten years to change our ways or the damages to our planet will be irreversible.

CLINTON: That is correct. And it saddens me that nobody wants to listen to him. After all, he’s been warning the American people for over ten years now.

MM: So time’s up already?

CLINTON: It depends on what the meaning of the word “time” is. This decade’s new jobs are in clean energy, and we haven’t seized them. We have a short time in the life of the planet to turn this around.

MM: Ten years, maybe?

CLINTON: You got it, Mike!

MM: The automobile industry is significantly reducing their production in hybrid cars. Despite the big hype consumers don’t seem to be interested. What’s your take on that?

CLINTON: Guess what? I think pulling out of Iraq would be a mistake!

MM: You do?

CLINTON: Yes. Once you break the eggs, you have the responsibility to make an omelet. It’d be an error to say we’ll leave by X date.

MM: In other words, you support the war on terrorism?

CLINTON: Of course! However, I have a deep belief in keeping channels of communication open, even to groups that support terrorist activities, like Hamas in the Middle East.

MM: I see. Global peace through chitchat.

CLINTON: I’m impressed. You’re not as dumb as you look. The more you talk, the fewer people will die. There is an inherent benefit to that … every single death is just another scar you have to claw through before you can make a deal.

MM: Let’s talk about your wife Hillary for a moment.

CLINTON: I never had sex with that woman … Mrs. Clinton!

MM: That’s all I needed to know. Thank you for your time, President Bill.

CLINTON: Thanks for having me on your porn site!

4 Responses »


Comments:
  1. Cant believe I ever voted for that guy. Just hope that Alte Sau wife of his dont win in ‘08

    Comment by preiss is nice - July 12, 2006 @ 8:45 am

  2. Michael, this is funny stuff. I posted a link to you but the trackback didn’t work… will continue to try.

    Comment by GM Roper - July 15, 2006 @ 8:23 am

  3. Mike, you have a real talent for parody: being able to drive to the edge without going over the cliff…Even more importantly, it’s funny.

    Comment by civil truth - July 15, 2006 @ 9:07 am

  4. Welcome to the U.S. Don’t give up your day job.

    Comment by Ray - July 15, 2006 @ 3:43 pm

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